Ask Dalia…

Question: “Can you use a sex toy on multiple partners?”

I find that since I am the wielder of #whoretips, I regularly get asked for my advice on situations of the dating/sexual relationship nature. Since I give these little nuggets of what I believe are wisdom, I thought I would start posting them here. I hope they are helpful or simply entertaining.

So… Here again is the question:

“Can you use a sex toy on multiple partners?”

I am going to assume first that this question is not about disposable items such as eatable underwear. Because of course the answer is: NO! This is closely followed by: What the Hell are you thinking?

But with normal sex toys?? I would have to say yes. However, there are a couple points to this which are 100% hygiene related.

First, and truly the most important, you HAVE to keep your toys clean. Even if you are only using them on yourself. I don’t mean throw them in the dishwasher. This can be bad, very bad, unless we are talking about glass toys, but again, you should most likely not put them in the dishwasher anyhow.

There are specific cleaners that should be used on sex toys. These will usually keep them from drying out and getting micro cracks where germs can hide.

Even if you are talking about items like handcuffs, sex pillows, blindfolds, sex-swings, ball-gags, etc, you want to make sure you keep these items clean. Anything that can come into contact with oraficies need to be nice and clean. 🙂

I do think that this question was not about so much the cleanliness “if” but the sharing “if” of using toys on multiple people.

The answer for me is I think it is fine.

Unless the person you are with specifically requests that you do not use a toy on/with them that has been used by another then I wouldn’t worry about it and also, I would not feel the need to volunteer this information. Similar to the “How many people you have been with before them?” it is not information I would volunteer without 1) being asked and 2) wanting to form a long term bond with that person.

I hope this helped and may your toys be plentiful.

xoxo

Dalia

P.S. If you have a question, please feel free to ask me here or email me dalialance@gmail.com. I would love to help you with your question if I can.

Ask Dalia…

Hello All,

I find that since I am the wielder of #whoretips, I regularly get asked for my advice on situations of the dating/sexual relationship nature. Since I give these little nuggets of what I believe are wisdom, I thought I would start posting them here. I hope they are helpful or simply entertaining.

Also, if you have a question, please feel free to ask me here or email me dalialance@gmail.com. I would love to help you with your question if I can.

So… Here is the question:

“At one point are you “in a relationship””?

The age old, how and when do you “name the puppy”?

Well boys and girls, I think it is funny when I hear people tell me that they don’t know if they are in a relationship or they tell me that they are waiting for the other person to tell them or declare it or something.

So weird.

It is really a simple thing and something you should be communicating with the person you may or may not be in this “relationship” with. Ask them!

If you find you want to be with that person, then you should probably make sure the feelings are mutual. That way you can’t be disappointing if you are more invested then they are or will be.

Before you mentally commit fully, find out if you are both in it for real.

xoxo

Dalia

Ask Dalia…

Hello All,

I find that since I am the wielder of #whoretips, I regularly get asked for my advice on situations of the dating/sexual relationship nature. Since I give these little nuggets of what I believe are wisdom, I thought I would start posting them here. I hope they are helpful or simply entertaining.

Also, if you have a question, please feel free to ask me here or email me dalialance@gmail.com. I would love to help you with your question if I can.

So… Here is the question:

“How long does it take to meet the real person you started dating?”

This question is amazing!

I would like to put the disclaimer that if you are in a “relationship” that is really only a playmate, you might not want to get to know them very well. After all, the more you know the more a connection forms. So, keep it to a first name only basis.

However, if you are looking for Mr. or Ms. Right, I have found that most, not all people tend to not present themselves fully until about six months into the relationship.

I can understand why people tend to try to put their best foot forward when starting to date someone, however, if that is not who you really are, then you will end up possibly disappointing the other person.

A very good friend once told me something that has been so true for me for years. He said, when he starts dating someone, if he finds he thinks that it is something he wants to pursue then he lets that person all the way in. He let’s them see the real him. He also tells them that one of his best friends is an ex-girlfriend. He feels that if a person cannot handle him with all of these things, then he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with them. It is that simple.

So, I say be yourself, but be prepared that the person you are seeing is not being themselves all the way and there may be a different person underneath.

So, happy hunting!

xoxo

Dalia

Ask Dalia…

Hello All,

I find that since I am the wielder of #whoretips, I regularly get asked for my advice on situations of the dating/sexual relationship nature. Since I give these little nuggets of what I believe are wisdom, I thought I would start posting them here. I hope they are helpful or simply entertaining.

Also, if you have a question, please feel free to ask me here or email me dalialance@gmail.com. I would love to help you with your question if I can.

So… Here is the question:

“Is it cheating if it is a virtual encounter?”

I wonder sometimes if these questions are looking for me to give them a thumbs-up to what they want to do. Instead I will dissect this little nugget.

So, the cheating question comes up more then one would think. Where is the line?

The entire subject of what is considered “cheating” can only be established by the rules of the relationship you are in. This means it is something you and your partner, playmate, or spouse has to decide.

Virtual is an interesting topic, because most of the time, things on the internet are not always what they appear to be. Also, putting very private things via text, photos and videos have the inevitable problem of being saved and shared by the other party.

#Whoretip: Do not put anything out via the internet that you are not comfortable sharing with the world. Because, that very well could happen.

I’m excited I got a whoretip out of this question to share. 🙂

Anyway, to answer the question, sharing any part of you: physically, mentally or emotionally that isn’t an agreement you have with anyone you are in a relationship with is cheating.

Hope this helps all you naughty virtual playmates.

xoxo

Dalia

Ask Dalia…

Hello All,

I find that since I am the wielder of #whoretips, I regularly get asked for my advice on situations of the dating/sexual relationship nature. Since I give these little nuggets of what I believe are wisdom, I thought I would start posting them here. I hope they are helpful or simply entertaining.

Also, if you have a question, please feel free to ask me here or email me dalialance@gmail.com. I would love to help you with your question if I can.

So… Here is the question:

“Do I need to reveal my tattoos or piercings if they are hidden normally in my clothes before my clothes come off?”

This one, I was surprised I was asked. How did this come up? Well I asked and the answer suprised me. The person asking, a female, has a clit piercing, and she had been seeing a gentleman for about two weeks and they decided to seal-the-deal so to speak and when they did, in the middle of the defined mating ritual (aka sex) he left.

Yep ladies and gentlemen: He left her there in the room.

When confronted later, he said that he came up close to her clit piercing and it freaked him out.

WHAT????

You left perfectly good sex because of that? What the hell is wrong with you?

I know, I thought the same things, however, you have to remember something: You never know that will turn someone on or off. It is not fair to judge someone based on what they like or don’t. I will however judge him for how he handled the situation. It was bad, very bad.

Alas, let’s get to my advice on this very controversial subject, just kidding. Seriously though, yes, I would give a little warning what a person may encounter when the clothes come off unless they specify they don’t want to know.  This even includes your grooming routines. If you have a big bush (This applies to boys or girls) then you may want to give warning before the jungle adventure begins for your partner.

So… There you have it, disclosure is always best. 🙂

xoxo

Dalia

Ask Dalia…

Hello All,

I find that since I am the wielder of #whoretips, I regularly get asked for my advice on situations of the dating/sexual relationship nature. Since I give these little nuggets of what I believe are wisdom, I thought I would start posting them here. I hope they are helpful or simply entertaining.

Also, if you have a question, please feel free to ask me here or email me dalialance@gmail.com. I would love to help you with your question if I can.

So… Here is the question:

“Are you required to disclose if you have had a venial disease?”

At first I almost didn’t list this question. I thought “of course you are”, but, as what I hope is an educated and intelligent individual, I took a minute and gave it some thought.

I have revised my answer!

Of course the answer is no longer as simple as yes or no.

The answer is now full of grey areas.

First if you have a disease such as herpes which I refer to as the “gift that keeps on giving” then yes, you should tell sexual partners even if you are not having an outbreak it is still something you can end up sharing. You might be thinking “If I wear a condom then I am protected”, this is not true my darlings. You are more protected, but guess what? You can still get things. Bodily fluids are just that: fluid. So they can get so many places and carry with it little germies.

HPV is another one you can share. Nobody wants warts on their cash-and-prizes. Also, most women don’t know they have it, so make sure you let your partner know there is a risk in having you as a playmate. Believe it or not, if this is a person who cares about you, they may not care at all you are a carrier. But, at least give them the option.

Now if it is a disease you have been treated for and the shot or pills cleared it up? Then I suggest getting tested regularly, depending on how many partners you have, testing should be once a year and if you are clean, then don’t share unless asked and this is someone you plan on playing with regularly.

As I have said before, if this is a one time thing, you don’t actually owe that person any personal facts, even your real name, that is how you can get internet stalkers.

So… my advice besides the above… USE PROTECTION!!!

Hope you have a disease free day!

xoxo

Dalia

Ask Dalia…

Hello All,

I find that since I am the wielder of #whoretips, I regularly get asked for my advice on situations of the dating/sexual relationship nature. Since I give these little nuggets of what I believe are wisdom, I thought I would start posting them here. I hope they are helpful or simply entertaining.

Also, if you have a question, please feel free to ask me here or email me dalialance@gmail.com. I would love to help you with your question if I can.

So… Here is the question:

“Which is more intimate: Oral or Sex?”

I loved this question, honestly I love most of the questions I am asked, but this one is fun because it reminds me about when you first start dabbling, shall we say, in the sex for the first time.

Even as we are older I think that there are a portion, of mainly women, who are now or were not comfortable with someone “going down on them.”

I have also found this to be true when it comes to women giving blow-jobs or what I like to call “blowies”. Even past the beginning stages it seems that this can carry forward. I recently spoke to a friend who I believed to be very sexual and she dislikes giving blow-jobs because her partner doesn’t come fast enough.

This of course made me laugh, because during sex you don’t want your partner finishing too fast.

So…. Guess what? You can have it both ways!!! What you say? I’ll explain.

First getting to a orgasim is dependant on the person and what gets him off. But I will give a little hint: What usually helps in the “getting off” department is the repeated motion that is giving pleasure. Meaning if you are “changing what you are doing” every few moments it doesn’t allow you to build up to a climax. Basically ladies you, yes you, are making this take longer.

Now that we have cleared that up, let’s talk about the question asked. I would like to say this has a definite answer but it doesn’t from an outside person. The answer is what is more intimate to you. Simple as that. For me, in case you were wondering, I think Oral is more intimate, you are up close and personal when you are face-to-face with the cash and prizes of your partner.

So playmates out there… Although I didn’t clear up this mega-mystery I hope I have helped you in some small way. 🙂

xoxo

Dalia