I was out at a bar the other night, big surprise I know. I happened to be with two of my most amazing friends. The subject got brought up of Fetishes, after a couple of Key Lime Mojitos.
They asked me if I had any fetishes. Of course I do… I mean, doesn’t everyone?
It is however, never quite that simple. So, I decided while taking another sip to look up what truly defines a fetish.
The word fetish actually originated in 1610s (per dictionary.com), fatisso, from Portuguese feitiço “charm, sorcery,” from Latin facticius “made by art,” from facere “to make”.
If you look at the definitions displayed they don’t seem to help much either.
1. an object regarded with awe as being the embodiment or habitation of a potent spirit or as having magical potency.
2. any object, idea, etc., eliciting unquestioning reverence, respect, or devotion: to make a fetish of high grades.
3. Psychology. any object or non-genital part of the body that causes a habitual erotic response or fixation.
Silly me, I thought being tied up was a fetish, or dressing as a furry, or any number of other ways one can get turned on. However, it seems that at least if we want to use the English language properly, then the above options are not a fetish.
I decided to turn to urbandictionary.com for some help. If you don’t like the way a word is used, find somewhere else with the definition you want. Here is what it had to say:
1. An object thought to have magical
, especially magically sexual, powers
2. A sexual fixation or obsession with a usually non-sexual object. EX. socks, horses, monkeys, pain, bondage
So, now I suppose we can label everything I described above as a fetish. Now that it has been settled. We can talk about the question posed.
I realized in being asked that question, “Do you have a fetish?” implies that I have a sexual fixation or erotic response to something that is considered “not normal”. If it is normal then it wouldn’t be a fetish would it?
Alas, this of course calls me to question, what exactly defines normal sex? Is it man & woman, in a bed, in the dark, in a missionary position. Can they talk? It seems all too confining.
I think that everyone who truly enjoys sex, has what would be considered a fetish. I know I do. I have several.
How about you?
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